First Day of School

Today is the first day of school for students in Pulaski County Special School District in Arkansas.

My daughter's bus came at 6:45 am. 6:45!! But you better believe, she hit the bus stop like she was hitting the run way -- in full Diva Mode. Wow! Still, she took a solid minute out of her routine to pop into my room and give me a kiss on the cheek. I love that (no so) little girl!

Now, the boys. . Well, this morning was a wake up call for me. The I'm Awake kiss I usually get - Nope! I rushed them through the getting ready routine, and walked them to the bus stop (twice). You think they even considered puckering them lips for a kiss for the Momma that is having a hell of a time transitioning. NO!

I watched them get on the bus. Before they got on, I made a plan, and BOTH of them shot me the DON'T EMBARRASS ME look. Embarrass them? I am NOT my mother! I don't embarrass. . I just want a little pre-first day of school affection.

I wanted to believe that they had just forgotten to give me a kiss, so I met them at the elementary school to give them another chance. I KNOW I heard my 9 year old say, "I am SO embarrassed." before he pretended not to see me and headed to class. My 7 year old -- the baby that is FULL of affection - said, "Mommy, I got it." and went on. .

No love. No snuggles. No nothing.

I know my kids are getting bigger, older, more mature. Well, Stevie Wonder can see that! But I'm just not quite ready for the transition to "My Mom embarrasses me" just yet. I LOVE them! I LOVE THEM! They are my whole world!

Kisses, I don't need. But hugs I do, so I plan to meet ALL of them at home - since I cleverly took the day off - with open arms when their first day of school is over. In the meantime, I'll just lick my wounds and recover.

Teaching my son to be a man: Excuse my potty mouth

For the sensitive and ultra-conservative, this is not your kinda story. . To add to that, for the sensitive and ultra-conservative, this is not your kinda blog. . but let's not get caught up in introductions.

This weekend me, the kids, and the boyfriend braved the crazy cold weather to watch the Little Rock Christmas Parade (after being FORCED to watch the crappy Jacksonville Christmas Parade because my daughter's band chose to partake) which is a component of our holiday tradition that we continue to maintain.

At some point near the end, my six year old, could not wait to go pee. So the boyfriend did the honorable thing and volunteered to take my son to the potty.

As you are considering what happened next, please remember that my family is not the outdoorsy type. We generally hold our pee for indoor plumbing, so the whole "you have to pee outside" thing probably took my son by surprise.

Once he was correctly positioned to do his business, my son did what he was taught to do. He pulled his pants down to pee. Apparently, the expectation (from the boyfriend) was that he would reveal the portion of his body that needed to perform for this duty and leave the rest of his body cozily covered in the 30ish degree weather. But again, as he was taught, my son, pulled his pants down to his ankles and commenced to go pee.

The boyfriend was shocked - appauled even - to look over and see my son's bottom and a large portion of his legs bare while he went to the bathroom. He asked, "Son, what are you doing?" Of course, my son looked at him and stated the obvious, ".. going pee."

The boyfriend took note of the scene, allowed my son to fully relieve himself, and waited until we were comfortably at home to dig deeper into what he thought was a very odd tendency for my fully potty trained six-year old son. He described, as I have to you, what happened, and waited until the end to burst into laughter.

I had my back to him, so it took him quite a while to figure out that I did not get the humor in the situation. Since I had not caught on, I thought I would address him.

"What else could J do when he went to the bathroom if he did not pull down his pants?" I asked. "Ha! Well, he could've just taken it out. He can't just expose his entire body every time he has to go pee," said the boyfriend. "What does he do when he goes to a regular bathroom: at home, the mall, or at school?"

Without him saying it, I was then able to figure it out. I never gave consideration to what men do when I potty trained my boys. My eight-year old had somehow just picked it up, but not the baby. He did what Mommy does. .

I can do this. I can teach my sons to be a man. I can teach them to be caring, honest, hard-working, dependable.. all the good stuff that comes with being a human being. But my brother, boyfriend, church member, friends, ex (as much as I hate to mention him), are invaluable in guiding me and my sons on the details that I miss..

And by all means, don't die of embarrassment when you learn about the missed details in public. I'm not perfect. Bring it to light. We can laugh and move on.