Monday, August 31, 2009

When will my knight in shining armor come long?

My facade gives people the impression that I've got everything under control. Others are so comforted by the idea that they tend to turn to me for advice, thinking that if they accept my advice, they will have a perfect life just like I do.

Well, it is pretty freakin' awesome, right?

I have a dream job. I work for a non-profit dedicating to ending hunger and poverty and caring for the earth. How cool is that?

I have 3 beautiful children; all out of the bottle-sucking, diaper soiling stage. I feel pretty good about that.

I own my own home, and a new car, and a cute dog. . and blah. . blah blah. blah blah. . Life is so freaking awesome. Right?

WRONG!!!!!!

I work, and I nurture, and I pray. . all alone. . I cook, and clean, and repair. . all alone. . I am alone after being in a 14 year relationship that I honestly thought would last forever. But no. I'm alone.

I will NOT complain. I know God's sense of humor. He'll send the smite to me, and I will wake up with one enlarged eye and one crooked leg. I get it. But if there are any more blessings waiting for me up there. . any additional grace God is planning to pour down on me. . any other special favor he wants to grant. .

If there's anything else, God, please let it be wrapped in someone 5'10 or taller, 180 lbs or smaller, employed, funny, smart, comfortable around kids, and most of all God fearing.

Amen.